Divorce is always a sensitive period for most parents. With heightened emotions, and feelings of hurt, pain, rage, anger, etc., divorcing parents may make some unreasonable judgments. If you find yourself in such high-conflict parenting, you are likely to benefit from the services of parent coordinators In Arizona.
Who is a Parent Coordinator?
A parent coordinator is a third party who assists parents in navigating through the difficulties, disagreements, and disputes of high-conflict parenting that arise during a divorce. They do not work in favor of any parent but in the interest of the children by helping families to resolve conflict situations and uphold the parenting agreement to ensure that the needs of the children are met.
Due to the nature of their work, parent coordinators usually have a background in child psychology. They can be psychologists, therapists, attorneys, social workers, or mental health professionals who can provide parents with problem-solving techniques.
How a Parent Coordinator Can Help You Through Your Divorce
Not everyone going through a divorce may need a parent coordinator. Most times, parent coordinators are only needed in cases of high-conflict parenting where co-parents find it difficult to get along with themselves to the detriment of their children. In that case, a parent coordinator may play the following roles.
- They Help to Enhance Communication Between Co-parents
Most divorcing parents experience a break in communication, even in an amicable divorce. This break in communication affects not only how both parties communicate with each other but also how they communicate with their children. Most conflicts or disagreement often stems from the inability of one party to effectively communicate their ideas, feelings, or thoughts to the other party without triggering a negative feeling. A parent coordinator can help to mediate communication in several ways.
First, they can meet both co-parents separately to find out what their challenges are and also to understand the difficulties they face. This knowledge would help them provide a workable solution that would help both parties to lay aside their feelings and resolve their differences peacefully. Also, they can educate co-parents on effective communication and healthy conflict-resolution techniques.
- They Help to Ease Tension
Going through a divorce is a major life change for most people. Even when the divorce process goes smoothly, it will still affect you and your family one way or the other. Having conflicts with your co-parent adds tension to the stress of the divorce. While co-parents may not always fight in front of their children, however, children are always sensitive to noticing the tension between parents. Parents coordinators are not only interested in the children’s well-being, but they also get involved in the well-being of co-parents. They can help co-parents to overcome issues that lead to tension in their relationship. They can also provide them with tips on how to avoid or resolve such issues in the future.
- They Monitor the Children’s Welfare
Children often bear the heat of the divorce process. The sole responsibility of the parent coordinator is to ensure that the children are not neglected, nor are their rights violated. If any of such instances happen, the parent coordinator also has the responsibility of notifying the court.
Signs You Need a Parent Coordinator
Disagreements after a divorce are common, but if you and your ex-spouse are having a hard time coming to a reasonable agreement, consider your children’s welfare, or you just can’t seem to keep to the parenting agreement, you may need to consult a parent coordinator or the court may provide one for you. Here are some signs that indicate it’s time to consult a coordinator.
- Constant arguments or fights in the presence of your children
- The inability of the children to attend school activities or special events due to a disagreement between you and your ex-spouse over the event
- One parent withholds their children from visiting other relatives such as cousins, grandparents, uncles, aunts, and vice-versa.
- Disagreement over parenting styles, religious views, social views, curfew, house chores, etc
- The children are withdrawn, distressed, or destabilized by their parent’s constant conflict over issues concerning their daily lives
While a divorce puts emotional strain on both couples, it also has a lasting emotional impact on the children, especially when it is not handled properly. Putting differences and emotional feelings aside and collaborating on a parenting style that fosters the well-being of the children should be the goal of every parent. But where that seems impossible, opting for a parent coordinator may be the next best option to preserve your integrity as a parent and make the right choice in the interest of your children.